Sunday, December 28, 2008

* In Watchmen Ozymandias has an action figure line planned using the main characters, all of whom are deconstructed superheroes, at best antiheroes and at worst mass-murdering psychopaths. However, official ones are being released as a movie tie in—it's not clear whether this is tongue-in-cheek or whether they're just milking all they can out of it. Oddly, he didn't approve of the action figures of Rorschach or Night Owl. Even the guy who murdered half of New York draws a line sooner than DC. Though a large part of it is he thinks they won't sell ("The world isn't interested in superheroes").
  • Also, there is quite a bit of difference between making a action figure of dark but fictional characters and making action figures of people who, in his universe, actually existed.
  • Looking over at This Troper's Albert Einstein, Sigmund Freud and Barack Obama chilling out with Zuko, Snoopy, and Gutsman makes me wonder what exactly that difference is.
  • "It's ok, as long as they were recently deceased or currently alive mass-murders?" Unless there is something about Eintsein, Freud and Obama that people haven't told this troper about.
  • The physicists and astronomers will look up at me, with their failing Newtonian cosmology, and shout, save us! And I will say, 'E=MC^2.' Hey, he was out sniffing drainpipes in "Desolation Row."
From the TV Tropes page on Misaimed Marketing

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

The Story of Dawn!

Bye mom! I, know being 10, can choose my career, as you already know. I want to be a Pokemon Master! I will travel to every dark alley, every evil doers hideout, and help out grown men. They might even compliment me on my skirt that I can't even sit down in without showing my panties! Nothing can go wrong! Especially with my violent deformed penguin! He will be able to knock out scary birds and the fattest gerbils you have ever seen! And if he dies, I will go throw magical tennis balls at wild deformed animals! That way, when I obtain their freedom, I can use them to fight other deformed animals against their wills. They will belong to me! ME!! I even get an exclusive encyclopedia that I can use to find out about other deformed animals! Yep, the long perilous journey, full of people all look alike. I am going to need help, I realise. That is what I have random strangers for! I will ask them my question, and they will give me an answer! Over and over and over again, as if they cannot say anything else. I don't even have to worry about money shortage! I will scam everybody out of their money with my penguin that trained on deformed animals! His explosive bubbles will save the day! Well this is it. See you after I beat the champion!

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Monday, November 10, 2008

Mega Man characters taking a test


Just for random laughs, if Harpuia, Leviathan, Fefnir and Phantom were stuck in a college classroom, and had to take a math test-

Who would come close to acing it?

Harpuia takes the exam fair and square. 93.
Leviathan tries to seduce the proctor. 100.
Fefnir cheats off Harpuia. 85.
Phantom steals the answers. 100.

Other exam-takers:
Elpizo gets stuck on a question and tries to absorb the Dark Elf for brainpower. DQ'd for cheating.
Omega's pen(cil) breaks, he destroys a row of seats in anger with charged saber. DQ'd for property damage.
Ciel contests the lethally competitive nature of the exam, but buckles down and finishes it anyway. 90.
Zero is given the answers by X, but self-DQ's to take the exam without outside interference. X is DQ'd for giving out answers.
Copy X tries to call Phantom out for cheating, but is shot by most everyone else in the room for being a tattletale. DQ'd to receive medical attention.
Neige sneaks a microfilm camera into the classroom, takes photos of exam to run exposé on broken school curriculum. Gets a 75 taking it legitimately, but contests results on the grounds that it was biased towards the limits of Reploid processing power.
Kraft takes exam legitimately. 80.
Alouette uses bunny-mounted time-space communicator to get answers from Prairie. Prairie lies about several right answers to prevent a time paradox. 85.
Colbor takes exam legitimately, but brought all the post-exam snacks. 105 after 10 points of extra credit.
Megaman.EXE takes exam by mistake - his class was two doors further down. 95 with some explaining to do about the zero in Life Sciences.

Hm... What about Weil or the operators?

For more paradox based fun, Giro.

Weil would probably ace it, but posing an unfair advantage for his genius, automaticly DQ'd.

Janne (red-haired operator, IIRC) is the proctor. I don't believe this will affect Leviathan's score too much.

Weil is the department head... at least, until the Zero semester ends with Zero stopping him from slamming Ragnarok into the football field.

ZX Semester - Calculus 1 Midterm Results
Department Head: Master Thomas
Proctor: Master Mikhail
(Albert is busy cleaning up the football field for his nefarious purposes.)

Vent takes exam properly. 85.
Giro has a heart attack mid-exam, passes his answers to Aile in his death throes. Roommate Cedre gets a free ride for the semester.
Aile uses Giro's answers (mostly right), but was dared to slip a certain "upgrade part" in her shorts while taking the exam. 95 and a pending sexual harassment lawsuit against Ashe.
Grey keeps trying to take the exam legit, but throws Model A into a window after it keeps whispering answers to him. DQ'd for cheating AND property damage.
Ashe's booty fixation leads to her becoming aroused during a word problem regarding pirate treasure. 75 (DNF) and a pending crush on Tron Bonne.
Prometheus tries re-wording the word problems so that they revolve around causing mayhem. Strangely, it works. 95.
Pandora takes the exam properly, but gets DQ'd for using headphones in class (despite both her 100 AND the fact that the only audio files in her helmet were The Mega Man Network's downloadable music database).
Aeolus reads the first page, leaves exam room claiming it a foolish waste of time. Self DQ'd.
Thetis demands a copy of the exam printed on 100% post-consumer paper. DQ'd for being a hippie.
Atlas takes exam properly. 80, but demands extra credit through an applied lesson conducted in joint with the school's ROTC unit.
Siarnaq gets caught in an interminable loop upon hitting a typo. 50 (DNF) and two weeks in the shop.

But Classic doesn't have that many major players. And damned if I'm making up results for - what is it now, two sixes plus eight eights - yeah, 76 Robot Masters. Plus the "Genesis Unit." And the Rockman Killers. And the Stardroids. And Oil Man and Time Man. And the MM3PC Robot Masters. And King. And Fake Man. And Dark Man. And Mettonger Z, who I'm only really including because I'm a Super Robot fanboy and it was the most awesome fortress boss in MM6.

So I'll humor you instead with an exam held in a world covered by endless water...

General Knowledge Exam - Legends Semester
Dept. Head - Mistress Yuna (body: Matilda Caskett)
Proctor: Megaman Juno

Trigger takes exam properly...or at least, that's what everyone believes since they don't know Data is feeding him answers. 100.
Roll tries to take exam properly, but Tron's constant annoyances lead to fisticuffs. Both are DQ'd after a Servbot goes flying through a window.
Tiesel tries scanning for the answer sheet with his heretofore-unexplained robot eyes, but winds up distracted by the confiscated porno mags in Juno's desk (mostly from Trigger, shockingly). 35 (DNF).
Bon makes random marks. 65, even though all write-in answers in the English portion are filled in with iterations of "Babuu."
Sera (body: default) sneaks out of the exam room, proceeds to invade the department office to launch a Curriculum Reinitialization Program. Stopped by Yuna. DQ'd for attempted genocide, pending review session in Yuna's quarters.
Glyde hot-dogs the exam, confident that his reputation as a legacy will fill in the gaps. The previously ejected Tron makes sure to throw a wrench in that plan with a few well-placed bits of misinformation in his school record. 75, pending investigation into 4 instances of underage drinking during a school-funded function and 2 charges of inappropriate advances towards a Servbot.
Bola takes exam properly, if half-heartedly 'cause he's already got a free ride for the semester (trauma due to roommate Klaymoor being hospitalized for back issues). 70.
Pokte Mayor tries turning the tables, giving Juno an exam. Juno pays the 2 million Zenny instead, since he always misses the "heaviest quark" question. 88.
Guildmaster, knowing full well he didn't bother studying, rigs the building to self-destruct if he fails. Trigger decides he'll have none of that, and starts passing him enough answers to guarantee the school's safety. 80.
Appo, Dah, and Shu send their exams in absentee, being absent to attend to an abused pig in the hospital. 90/90/100.

What happens when you mix Pikachu with Will Smith?

Now this is a story all about when,
I beat my Rival back to Viridian.
I'd like to a moment, I won't be a pest,
I'll tell you how I became the Champion, the best.

In northwestern Pallet Town, born and raised,
Out in town is where I spent most of my days.
Dreaming up, fishing, relaxing, in the zone,
And flirting with my Rival's sister in his home.
When he picked up a pogey, and was up to no good,
Started being an ass in my neighborhood.
We got in one little fight, and Oak got impressed,
He said, "Take this pokemon, now go catch the rest."

I whistled for my friends, and when they came near,
The sister gave a townmap, Mom said, "Good luck, dear."
If anything I could say that I wanted to stay home,
But I thought, "Naw forget it...Yo homes, to Plateau!"

I...pulled...up to Indigo, at about seven or eight,
Got one-fifty pogies, made the E4 yell, "RAPE!"
Beat up my Rival just five minutes later,
And registered my name as the Pokemon Trainer.
- AcePiGGy

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Scientific explaination of Hell


The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid term.

The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."


Sunday, October 12, 2008


It's a mega man game. Run to the right. If that doesn't work, run to the left.
- EternallyPokey

So Brazil is the Diamond/Pearl board of the world?
- hobbit86

OMG! Cats and dogs living together in sin!?? This cannot be! Now they will breed a weird wolf/panther hybrid creature that will dominate the food chain and reduce our civilization into a smoldering pile or ash, rubble, and Twinkies!
- mbollige

Playing Pokemon is like killing a hobo. You need to do it at a nice slow pace so you can relish every emotion and action. When it's over you want to feel accomplished as if the task was truly worth your while.
- glory of power metal

I won several formal debates in college using my patented technique of simply repeating my opponent's argument in a high-pitched, mocking tone while wiggling my fingers in the air. There really is no defense.

- David Wong, 6 Brainwashing Techniques They're using On You Right Now

Later Crassus went off to war in Parthia (modern day Iran). His soldiers demanded he parley with the Parthians who had offered to meet him. At the meeting Crassus was seized, tortured and had molten silver poured down his throat to sate his thirst for wealth. And that, Mr. Obama, is why you don't negotiate with Iran.

- Danny Harkins, The Six Most Horrifying Ways Anyone Ever Got Rich

Monday, September 29, 2008

Pokemon main antagonist

The oly article from the old Stinkolair I wrote myself that I decided to salvage:

Those trainers out in the field are working for someone. Random Encounters are not so random. They all want to hurt you, but why? There is a single main antagonist of all of the pokemon games. Think about it. Who is in every town of every game? That's right: Nurse Joy.
She pays all of those trainers to challenge you. all of those pokemon are hers. Every time she heals your team she gets money, so she has a reason. She is the main villain. Giovanni, Archie, Maxie, Cyrus... all her officers.

"We hope to see you again!" Yes. of course you do...

Meteor Mash

lyrics by winterlord, to the tune of Monster Mash:

I was pokemoning on the net late one night
When my eyes beheld an eerie sight
For my pocket monster began to rise
And suddenly to my surprise

He did the mash
He did the meteor mash
The meteor mash
It was a critical hax
He did the mash
And it raised attack
He did the mash
He did the meteor mash

From my smogon server in the internet east
To some random place where the brazilians feast
The metagross all came from their humble abodes
To use earthquake on my electrodes

They did the mash
They did the meteor mash
The meteor mash
It was a critical hax
They did the mash
And it raised attack
They did the mash
They did the meteor mash

The metagross were having fun
The party had just begun
The guests included Skarmory
And Magneton

The scene was rockin', with the metal sounds
Skarmory in chains, thunder all around
The digging-moles were about to arrive
With their vocal group, "The Dugtrio Five"

They played the mash
They played the meteor mash
The meteor mash
It was a critical hax
They played the mash
And it raised attack
They played the mash
They played the meteor mash

Out from the ground, Dugtrio's voice did ring
Seems he was troubled by just one thing
He opened the lid and shook his fist
And said, "Whatever happened to my Earthquake twist?"

It's now the mash
It's now the meteor mash
The meteor mash
And it's a critical hax
It's now the mash
It's raised attack
It's now the mash
It's now the meteor mash

Now everything's cool, Duggy's a part of the band
And my meteor mash is the hit of the land
For you, the pokemon, this mash was meant too
When you get to my door, tell them Metagross sent you

Then you can mash
Then you can meteor mash
The meteor mash
And do my critical hax
Then you can mash
You'll raise your attack
Then you can mash
Then you can meteor mash

Falcon Punch!

He’s pretty much the very best
Like no-one ever was
An iron plate makes up his chest
The man who has no flaws

He will travel across the land
Kicking folks with pride
F-Zero racers understand
There’s nowhere left to hide!

(Gotta punch ‘em all)
He’ll start with me
Then you and your family!
Oh, it never ends.
In this word he must upend!

(Gotta punch ‘em all)
That man in blue
You’re dead if he comes for you!

He’ll punch me
And he’ll kick you.

Gotta punch ‘em all.
Gotta punch ‘em all.

From the good book:

And he struck forth, and his wrath did cleave the offender's blade in twain with a flash of light and roar of thunder. The crowds receeded and fell silent, awed and terrified by the presence of the great one. And with the voice of a vengeful god, these words spake he: "This, is my boomstick!" -Necronomicon, Book of Ash, 3:14

Pokemon Diamond

FC: 1160-6194-0749

Nickname the name gender @ item
nature, secondary nature, ability
Move 1
Move 2
Move 3
Move 4

Pulseman the Rotom @ Focus Sash
Adamant, likes to thrash about,Levitate
Dark Pulse
Shadow Ball

Megaton the Metagross @ Leftovers
Lax, somewhat stubborn, Clear Body
Meteor Mash
Zen Headbutt

Inferno the Infernape M @ Choice Band
Naive, quick to flee, Blaze
Blaze Kick
Double Kick
Shadow Claw
Aerial Ace

Sumobear the Snorlax M @ Chesto Berry
Careful, likes to relax, Immunity
Body Slam
Focus Punch

Naruto the Poliwrath M @ Leftovers
Adamant, a little quick tempered, Water Absorb
Sleep Talk
Brick Break

Jessibelle the Gardevoir F @ Choice Specs
Hasty, likes to relax, Synchronize
Shadow Ball
Magical Leaf

MegaMan Star Force 2: Zerker

FC: 0130-3403-5987

  • Piran Kiss 3 X3 [favorite]
  • Dance Fire 3 X3
  • Mad Vulcan 2 X3 [favorite]
  • Great Axe X3
  • Berzerk Sword 3 X3
  • Buki 3 X3
  • Fire Slash X1
  • Elec Slash X1
  • Recover 300 X2 [favorite]
  • Aura X1
  • Paralyze Plus X3
  • General Auriga X1
  • Queen Ophuica X1
  • Muramasa X1
  • Avalance X1 [favorite]
  • Piran Kiss 3 ***
  • Mad Vulcan 2 ***
  • Wood Grenade **
Naruto - Ninja
- <>
- <>
- <>
- <>

Grey - Ninja
-Dance Fire 3
-Recover 200
-Taurus Fire
-Apollo Flame Sp

750 HP
Kaiser Knuckle
Hp +50
Hp +300
Humour Buster
Under Shirt
First Barrier
Light Sword

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Jump! Ultimate Stars

FC: 4682-6003-1789

Standard deck:


Strong Deck:

1: Gadzilla (Dr.Slump)
2 Red Haired Shanks (One Piece)
3. Sipuxiang (Hoshin Engi)
4. Yusuke Urameshi (Yu Yu Hakusho)
5. Kazuki Muto (Buso Renkin)
6. Yugi Muto (Yu-Gi-Oh)
7. Arale Torimaki (Dr. Slump)
8. Himura Kenshin (Ruroni Kenshin)
9. Rukia Kuchiki (Bleach)
0. Tsunayoshi Sawada (Katekyo Hitman Reborn)